The Naughty Buffaloes of Rampur


Finally, Azam Khan’s seven beauties are safely back home. Ah! Nation takes a sigh of relief. After all, our police has many more irrelevant duties – like protecting the citizens – to perform?

Azam Khan seems to be a nice man. His care for the animals is commendable – it is a different matter altogether that he got three police officials transferred after this calamity. Animal right activists must honour his gallantry.

As elections are near, this episode is believed to have an impact on the national politics. Tomorrow, Congress will call it a ‘communal conspiracy’ against Rahul Gandhi. BJP will write a confidential letter (which our Tezz media will leak before it reaches the minister) to the Home Minister, stating that Arvind Kejriwal made up all this to gain cheap media publicity. Aam Aadmi Party on the other hand will call a press conference and ask all the buffalo owners to join hands against the corrupts.
Whereas, the third front will reiterate that there is no Modi wave!

AzamWhile many conspiracy theories will evolve now, our media will make us forget the plight of the poor buffaloes. After all, what forced them to run away from their home?

An undercover reporter, who doesn’t want to be named out of fear of his mother-in-law, went inside the house of Azam Khan and tried to uncover the truth.
Here is the truth!

Reporter (to buffalo): “Your master cares for you so much, why did you run away then?”

Head Buffalo: “Look, Bra-dar. We is don’t like this man Azam Khan. He go to Ame-rika to no about waste management. He study no thing!
We is still made to sit on our shit! That is why we decide, No more shit, and run away.”

And then the reporter questioned Azam Khan.

Reporter: “Sir, it is clear that you love your buffaloes. So why did they run away from your house? What is the conspiracy?”

Azam Khan (after removing his spectacles):
“Look, there is no conspiracy at all. Social Media is creating the conspiracy!
Buffaloes are like… daughters to me. It is when I asked them to cook Rogan Gosht for me they took offence and ran away.


4 thoughts on “The Naughty Buffaloes of Rampur

  1. Police men searching for buffaloes and are suspended when they cant find them and nothing happens when atrocities are committed against women and common masses! What a state we live in.
    Wonderful satire, Sunil. 🙂


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